B.J. Frazier’s BDSM Checklists
You have a naughty smedia account, watched tons of porn, conducted research, and now you want to play but don’t know how to get started?
You’re not alone.
People ask me how to get started with BDSM, how to involve partners, and how to begin a conversation.
Not knowing what to say is no excuse to skip the communication.
Communication is essential!
A great “icebreaker” is the BDSM Checklist. Learn more about the form and BDSM in general in a recent blog post.
I created two checklists. One is a grouping of kinks with itemized play activities listed (B.J. Frazier’s BDSM Checklist by Group). It is shorter and focuses on particular areas.
The other is an alphabetized list of activities (B.J. Frazier’s Alphabetized BDSM Checklist). There may be things you and/or your partner haven’t heard of, so have fun exploring together.
Each list has two segments: the past and the future. The past is for things the submissive has already experienced and how much he enjoyed it. The future is 
for the submissive’s hard limits, boundaries, wants and must haves.
Even though checklists are filled out by submissives, both of you should share experiences. The goal is not to race but to communicate. In fact, you may not finish it in one setting.
After seeing the checklists, you’ll think, “Wow, B.J., these are so comprehensive! You put a lot of time and energy into creating these… why are you giving them away for free?”
They’re free because this information needs to be readily available and utilized.
That said, I welcome you to buy me a drink.
You can print the forms and fill them out manually or do everything digitally. Meaning, the forms are fillable with check boxes or text boxes, so you can download, fill and save them to your devices.
I think you’ll agree the checklists are highly impressive.
Show me that you support my efforts in 
ensuring our community is safe and well-informed by buying me a drink.
The checklists are just that: lists. Please research kinky play, safe play and aftercare on your own before beginning any scene with your partner. For basic BDSM information, see my blog post “Ask” section.
A great complement to the checklist are quizzes to match your kink with one of my characters and/or books. Read them together for even more creativity and kinky ideas.
Be kinky, be safe, and be observant!
~B.J.
“Before the punishment can begin, we need rules.” ~ Jeneca Avery to a sub in “Mistress Managed – Book One”
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about here . . . I’ve done this many times before and have seen all kinds of interesting things.” ~ Dr. Francesca Doram to a patient in “Perchance to Dream – Book One”
“You’re free to be as creative and sadistic as you want… but you have a duty to stay within the parameters of your client.” ~ Lennie Jackson to Raina/Storm in “Best Served Cold”
“To claim them when they freely gave themselves was much more satisfying than when they felt like they had no choice. Because there was always a choice.” ~ Goddess Serena in “14-Day Lockdown with Goddess Serena”
“I need to give you some instructions . . . I feel like I know you well enough but . . . you need to know what to do in the event this becomes too much for you.” ~ Shane Shacklford to Anne Rickerson in “Betting the Pride; Losing the Prejudice – Book Three”
“I want to take you to new heights, to experience erotic pleasure beyond the ordinary. Will you trust me to take you on that journey?” ~ Bernie Higgins to Eli Shaw in “Eli – Book One ~ The Seduction”
