Happy Thanksgiving Week
Thank You
Earlier this month I sent out a newsletter-only message about the passing of my five-year-old lab, Orbit. I didn’t want to include it in a blog post because it was too heavy. However, I’m including it here to say thank you for the huge response I received from my newsletter subscribers.
My only intention was to explain my absence from smedia during the difficult time. I didn’t expect anything back. But you shared your furry stories and sent love across the globe, which went straight to my heart.
I heard from some people whom I had never heard from before, and others I haven’t heard from in a long while. I never know who reads these posts (unless you write in with a comment), and I often wonder what the value is. To hear from a wide variety of people rejuvenated my spirits doubly. I cannot thank you enough.
Since we’re on the subject of newsletter subscribers… it’d be remiss of me not to tell you that they received a special coupon for Black Friday! Make sure you don’t miss out on the next special by subscribing today.
Also, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, if you sign up now and DM me, I will send you the Black Friday coupon good through this Friday only!
My Orbit used to smile. A lot. I’ll share (again) a meme that rubbug created for my special smiling guy, whom I miss so fucking much.
Hallmark and I are in Sync!
I recently discovered a new, two-part TV show on the Hallmark Channel called “Mistletoe Murders”. It reminded me of my new Christmas novel, “Mistletoe Bound”, not only because it contains the same word but because my book is the hallmark of a wonderful life *grin*
Pre-order your copy from my site today, and you will receive an email Christmas Eve (which is a day ahead of all other book retailers) to download and enjoy my latest holiday kinkfest!
Also, on my site, the preview is live. Check it out, pre-order, and then wait for Christmas.
Last month I told you about the two Halloween freebies that S.B. Medina was giving away. One of them I already read, and the other I recently read and reviewed.
“Bitch in the Box” is not for the faint of heart and actually dives straight into some kinks that top many people’s list of hard limits.
However, once you get past the macabre, there is a delicious psychological thriller that unfolds and reminds us that people may not always be what they first seem.
You can read my five-star review on Goodreads.
If you downloaded and read both of S.B. Medina’s books last month (or even just one), tell me about it!
Here’s what you said after the last blog post.
Mistress Mia ~ Thank you so much for the shoutout. For once my audio on something actually sounds good when I ran it through my speakers on my car, lol. Tell everyone I send my love, and I will holler back at you later! Also finally finished the book [The Complete Collection of Eli]. Oh my God it was so good. [Yay! Ecstatic you enjoyed “Eli” and hope to see you in Book Club next month!]
toymax ~ On the Satyr Hate: You know of course that I’m not the biggest fan of Gaius, but I would never go that far to call myself a hater. Like in every good story, there are characters who aren’t everybody’s darling. And that’s absolutely okay. If there is only the possibility of being either a hater or a lover, then I proudly declare that I am a lover. How could I not be a lover of someone who just wants to have fun in the form of sex? [This makes me smile, Max; danke :D]
On Mistress Mia: She truly seems to be the good soul of DomCon – and that also includes her sadistic side *grin* I love her recording, which is filled with enthusiasm and energy. Thank You for providing it. [I agree, and the thanks go entirely to Mistress Mia]
Multiperv ~ I’m guessing it must be very shocking to have readers not like a character – at least one who is not meant to be disliked – and especially one who is a favorite of yours. Does it just surprise you or did you feel somewhat betrayed or hurt when you first encountered it? I haven’t read enough of Gaius [From “The Dominion and the Sugilite”] yet to weigh in personally, but, based on what you described and from hearing a bit from ‘him’ via the audio reading sample, I think I probably will like him. [I was surprised, because I think Gaius is delightfully fun. I also see Bernie [From “Eli”] as a tragic figure, but most readers hate him, too :(]
Servicepet is right, at least for some of us, that we are socially awkward and having something to do at a function definitely helps versus just standing there trying to think of clever, interesting, or appropriate things to say. I’m glad he had such a good experience as a booth boy. [Thanks for sharing, MP. Servicepet was great to have around!]
I agree with sep, if someone harps on how long they’ve been in the scene, that’s a problem. It could also mean they went to one class or party back when they started and dropped out until recently. In short, more information on their background is needed to get an idea of how experienced and/or knowledgeable they really are. [Agreed, and people should take care before they enter into a power exchange with someone new]
Sub drop can indeed be brutal and lead to a lot of questioning and self-criticism, and I would say post-orgasm clarity can do that as well, particularly if you have multiple orgasms fairly close together. (and perhaps you can speak to the dom side as I know dom drop is a thing as well but I’m not sure if it leads to the same self-doubts). [Everyone is different, but yes, I have experienced “con-drop”]
Kudos to sep for another well done recap. [Many thanks to sep for ALL of his class reviews!]
“Did I mention I’m 6’5″?” That’s great yet also understandable on the House’s part. Exceptions are made for exceptional people. Goddess Severa is a Hacks fan? Yay! Thanks for including some of her vanilla side, and interests. [Goddess Severa is an exceptional woman, and I’m glad I had the chance to speak with her. I, too, binge-watched “Hacks” :)]
Send me your comments, and I’ll put them in the next blog post!
B.J.’s Online Book Club
You voted “Eli – Book Five ~ Triumph” to be the next Book Club book!
The next Online Book Club is Saturday, December 7, 2024 at 4:00 p.m., Eastern.
DM me to be included:
bdsmlr ~ Not Safe for Work
Tumblr ~ Questionably Safe for Work
Twitter ~ Safe for Work
TwitterNSFW ~ Not Safe for Work
FetLife ~ Safe for Work
Right Here ~ Safe for Work
Tis the Season
I always prefer that you buy, read and review my books as the best present you can give me. However, many of you have requested a Wish List so send me more tangible things for the holidays.
For you, I created a Throne Wish List.
As you shop for me, I ask you to also send me feedback on one of my books as well!
And as always, thank you.
BDSM Checklists
Check out my FREE BDSM Checklists.
I 
created two BDSM Checklists to assist with communication and negotiation. One is grouped by fetishes and the other is an alphabetical listing, and both have spaces for you to fill in additional ones.
Make sure you check out the Checklists! Then, let me know what you think and how you used them.
DomCon NOLA 2024 – Fifth Review
If you missed the other four, here are your links:
First Review
Second Review
Third Review
Fourth Review
Even though I wasn’t able to attend many classes this time, I was able to conduct more interviews. Plus, with three booth boys, there were more insights and reviews to include–you are so lucky 😀
Queen Hilarity stopped by the booth for some great energy. She shared that she was trying to get to 100 pokes or spanks on the butt. With three booth boys and me, she was excited to add four to her total. After she walked around the vending area, she returned to update us that she met her goal!
Paying it Forward
I had the pleasure of meeting Jem, who is an erotica reader. We shared a great energy, and she listened attentively while I talked about my books. She was focused on “The Service Sub”, but she only liked to read electronic books. So she made me a deal.
Jem said she loved my pitch, and loves to pay it forward. To have a win-win-win scenario, she said she would purchase the hardcopy of “The Service Sub” but only accept the electronic version. Over the course of the convention, Jem wanted me to select someone for whom the hardcopy would find a happy home. I told Jem I would inscribe it as being gifted from her.
On Sunday, after interviewing Sean and Mary from S&M Leatherworks (my booth neighbor–see their interview in the second DomCon review post), I got a warm fuzzy feeling that Mary would love the book. So, I sat down next to her and told her about Jem and the paying it forward story.
Mary said, “I know Jem!” Turns out that Jem and Mary are part of the same kink circle, and Jem had previously told Mary about the whole thing! Mary said she couldn’t wait to tell Jem about it, and would bring the book to their next event and place it on a table where other people could borrow it and pass it around.
Sometimes magical things really do happen.
If you’d like to make magic happen, please leave a review for the book(s) you’ve read, and “like” other positive reviews on Goodreads.
Three Daiquiris and Three Dudes…
There’s more to this title that got added as the weekend elapsed, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to recreate it, as it was a “had to be there” kinda thing. That said, I’ll tell you how it started.
Sep knows I love raspberry daiquiris and actually brought ingredients to make them at DomCon L.A. earlier this year. Time got away from us then, so I made sure that didn’t happen again in NOLA.
Late one evening, sep, Thomas, servicepet and I unwound in the living room. Sep set about making drinks. They were so yummy! When sep joined servicepet and I on a couch (Thomas was on another one), he asked for permission to massage my feet. I would’ve had my back to servicepet in an awkward position, so I grabbed a pillow and threw it on servicepet’s lap.
With my head in servicepet’s lap, a drink in hand, and my feet in sep’s lap, I was beyond content. Plus, the alcohol was swirling–I am a cheap drunk. The four of us were talking, joking and *laughing*.
Then I got to the end of my drink, which consisted of frozen bits that I could see landing on my face and not gracefully sliding into my mouth. I couldn’t leave them in the glass, and I couldn’t get up and walk to the kitchen from my position. So I turned to Thomas and said, “Thomas, can you please get me a spoon?”
When he brought it for me, he bowed and called me “milady”, because it was kinda ridiculous to be waited on by three men… but also, not gonna lie, pretty fucking cool!
But we also laughed about how we were living in a story about “Three Daiquiris and Three Dudes”, and we kept adding to it. Naturally, there was a call for me to write a story about that scenario, and so there you have it. Whaddya think?
Rookie Booth Boy Musings ~ by Thomas Antonson
If you read my earlier post, you already know that DomDon NOLA was my first ever DomCon. It was also my first time working in the B.J. Frazier Publications booth. It was an eye-opening experience.
I’ve known B.J. Frazier for more than a decade — possibly 14 or 15 years. How we connected is a story for another day. My point is that in all those years, I’d never seen her in action as a salesperson. I knew she had it in her background, but knowing the background and actually seeing her operate live and in person is another matter.
Holy shit. B.J. can fucking BRING IT. I was in front of the booth, luring the customers in, and then turning them over to B.J. That’s when the fun started. Once she got hold of them, it was rare for anyone to walk away without buying something.
Hell, she even sold a book to a young man from France who’d only been in the United States for three days and barely spoke a word of English. Think about that for a second. Okay, think about it for another second. Maybe two. She not only managed to communicate with him, she convinced him to make a purchase of a book he’d have to learn another language to read. I had to manually close my mouth, I was so in awe.
It wasn’t “hard sell” either, i.e. “What’s it gonna take to get you into this car.” She was calm, friendly, and RELENTLESS. She knew just what to say to keep customers engaged. Pretty soon they were walking away with an armload of books, wondering what just happened.
It was amazing. B.J. could sell [insert item] to [insert people who already have lots of that item].
Working the booth was fun. Not just because I got to see my good friend B.J. in action, but because we had a good crew who were fun to hang out with. I made two new friends in sep and servicepet; my co-booth boys. There were lulls in the vending area where we had time to talk and get to know each other. That was fun.
When things got busy, we worked together to make sure B.J. had what she needed when she needed it. Sep handled the technology, and servicepet and I handled the books so B.J. could sign them.
I also got to know some of the other vendors and learned a lot about what they were selling. I even got the true story of how Pizza Hut got started in Kansas. And, I learned about a Belgian pale ale that I want to try. One vendor told me about a convention just for authors of “smut” that we’d never heard of.
One of the cool things about the vendors is how they all help each other. We sent each other customers, helped each other with set-up issues, and chatted/laughed together during the slow periods when classes were in session. It was a lot for a rookie to take in, and I’m sure I don’t remember everything I saw or heard, but it was enough to make me start planning to be in L.A. in June to watch B.J. Frazier work her sales mojo on more customers.
I wonder if that young Frenchman will learn to read English, or just try to have the ebook translated. SMH.
Thomas ~ Hopefully my customers were *happy* with their purchases! 😀 Also, the Frenchman got the audio version of his book for free, because he said he can listen to English better than he can speak or read it. Thank you for this, and I can’t wait to do it again with you in June! By the way, have you tried that Belgian ale yet? 🙂
Classes
Engaging with Primal Play: A Live Demo – Goddess Greta Vanderthrust and That Big Bad Coyote ~ by sizeerrorprojection
The class description mentioned going beyond the takedowns and kidnappings and exploring primal play at its core. I’ve always been interested in primal play, but have been concerned about the level of violence as I’ve worked quite hard over the years to redirect that violence within me to help with more peaceful and positive pursuits. The description got my attention. As it turns out, I was not disappointed.
Goddess and TBBC are kink educators, porn models and producers, and live the lifestyle 24/7. Goddess is also a professional dominatrix who was first exposed to kink in the form of pony play when she was quite young. The Big Bad Coyote is a shibari performer and Goddess’ service submissive. Both presenters consider themselves as Old World Souls, the connotation I believe to be as having lived many past lives. They partake in intimate and romantic primal play.
Goddess defines primal play as releasing the raw unleashed side of yourself and believes that there are sides of everyone that cannot be controlled. Domesticated, absolutely not. Goddess Greta is a dominant person, but, when engaging in primal play, a slut. I’ve taken classes with primals that identify as vampires, wolves, bears: there is such a wide variety. The number one way to go to primal space is to take the thought out of your behaviors and react based on your instincts and sensory awareness of the world. The idea is to get your brain to stop judging your behaviors and find freedom and release from judgment in your interactions with other primals.
Types of Primal Play
Predator v Prey ~ where the predator can be a murderer; e.g., the big bad wolf chasing someone in the woods, or wild animal play as in a cougar hunting a deer.
Breeding pets ~ where the “pets” are not pets in the domestic sense, more so, they are wild breeding stock. Goddess Greta uses TBBC’s body as her vehicle to breed. Breeding does not necessarily mean getting someone pregnant, and the D/s dynamic is not required.
Primal mates ~ partners are on more equal footing as their primal selves and enjoy each other in that manner.
Carnal Humans ~ Vikings would be an example of a carnal human. The carnality need only be visual. When TBBC wears his face (coyote head mask), fur, and pelt, it puts him into his primal space.
The Five Senses
Scent play – pheromone connections through scent. TBBC’s hood smells of leather and sweat, and these scents help to put him into his primal space.
Taste – taste of skin, biting, piss play, marking territory with your cum, pissing in someone’s mouth, eating a steak, being fed food like an animal.
Touch – playing with chest hair (or any body hair) scratching, clawing, collaring the beast – a ritual behavior with primal intent. Pain can release your primal energy.
Visual – nudity, nudity with persona hood (e.g. – TBBC’s leather, full head coyote mask), or bonding energy between partners through eye contact during mutual masturbation.
Sound – barking, growling, whimpering, squealing… basically, anything that erupts, unfiltered from a primal.
The Big Bad Coyote is a service submissive in their dynamic. It’s his job to make Goddess Greta come. He typically comes up behind her, growling, to initiate primal play. He’ll breathe in her ear. They’ll make their way to breeding and use extended eye and physical contact to get in rhythm, matching their breathing and heart rate. Their primal connection continues after breeding as they come down together, continuing to feel each other’s breath, body, and heart beat.
Primal Gear and Sensory Deprivation
The Big Bad Coyote’s hood allows him to shut off noise, internal and external. It’s a 2-for-1 special, as it also looks beautiful. Once inside the hood, you hear your own breath. It helps the sub hear the dominant more clearly and permits him to be free to let go. I find this last thought intriguing, seeing parallels to chastity but with a different outcome. Chastity helps your sub hear you more clearly, but, for me anyway, it contains me and declares that I am owned, not free at all.
Goddess Greta uses monster cocks and tentacles combined with masturbation to put The Big Bad Coyote into his primal space. A butt plug or a tail (or combination) can make you feel primal, or controlled.
Goddess likes being used as her body was intended. Though she’s not necessarily into having a child, she is fully aware how good her body is for making babies. She warned against engaging in primal play without protection if you don’t want to get pregnant.
Sexual over-stimulation and denial are both forms of primal play. Some days, Goddess just wants to be filled with cum. In primal play, you accept your desire and go with it. She described soaking, which is staying inside your partner long after you come. Experience the contractions at orgasm, heart rate and breathing cycles sync up, then vaginal contractions begin, and you experience the primal connection as your partner’s cock softens. She mentioned getting a cock hard in your mouth can be a primal experience.
Primal feelings come from doing things you think your body cannot handle. Accepting pain when you don’t like it can be a very primal experience. Goddess demonstrated a collar with a horse stirrup on it that she can use to control her submissive with her feet. She talked about ripping each other out of their space with pain, or instant role reversal of the momentary dynamic, moving back and forth. Biting HARD into a meaty piece of shoulder, butt, pelvis, and places on the torso, leaving marks can escalate your primal feelings and those of your partner. If there are impact bruises present, press your knuckles into them as a reminder. Goddess ended the topic with a warning to be careful who witnesses these actions, and the results of these actions, as you can be accused of domestic violence by those who don’t understand.
Thanks, sep, for another great review! I think you got much more from this class than previous primal classes.
Interview with Domina Ballerina Goddess
Domina Ballerina Goddess walks with purpose and authority; usually with a sub in her wake. She stands only 4’10” (147 cm) but her aura and personality nearly double that size.
Sizeerrorprojection (sep) went to her Dragonback Tie class in L.A. and said she taught with humor and precision. He described her as exuberant, genuine, truly wanting to help, and intolerant of bullshit.
Between observing her at DomCon and sep’s report, I wanted to interview her in NOLA. But there was a big obstacle for me.
I have purposefully *not* mentioned it yet because it does not define her: Domina Ballerina Goddess is Deaf. Make no mistake; it is not an obstacle for her. I don’t communicate in ASL, but it was important to me to communicate in her language. If you haven’t read “The Message”, you can find it here.
Domina asked to do the interview in her room because it would be quieter. I readily agreed but didn’t fully understand the implication until the interview was almost over. Her audiogram states that she has “severe to profound hearing loss”, which she clarified in layman’s terms as “deaf as fuck”.
As an orally-speaking Deaf woman, she wears hearing aids which assist in amplifying sounds. She can also read lips most of the time, but this is often exhausting. People don’t think she’s deaf because she does a great job making people forget that she can’t hear.
The problem with sound amplification, though, is that *everything* gets amplified. The refrigerator in the room, the air handling system–things I automatically tune out–constantly vied for her attention. It’s draining, and, with a flourish, she removed the hearing aids and relished in the peaceful quietude.
When Domina first went to a dungeon, she had the normal *newbie* insecurities, but she also noticed other things. The room had low lighting. The music was loud. No phones were allowed. Dim light prevents her from reading lips. Loud music is like yelling in her ear. And no phones means she can’t use a translator app because people are afraid of pictures. [She is the only one allowed to use a phone in play parties at DomCon because people know she’s using it as a translator]
Ballerina Goddess was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness. It’s a conservative religion. They don’t celebrate holidays, and anything related to satan, like kink, is shameful. People who participate in shameful activities aren’t accepted in the new kingdom. Dancing is considered shameful, except for certain types, like ballet and ballroom. Domina has been a ballerina since the age of seven.
When she began to date, a chaperone was required to sit between her and her date at the movies, which didn’t feel right.
After she went to college, she left her religion behind, recognizing it as a cult. When she was 24, she went to a gay bar in upstate New York. It was completely different from being a Jehovah’s Witness, where it was forbidden to talk to gay people or have tattoos.
At the gay bar, Ballerina Goddess met a guy and started dancing with him. After getting his number through a friend, they met at his place a couple of weeks later. She has no idea why she asked, “What’s in your closet?” He pulled out a dagger. Ballerina Goddess had gone to culinary school and was familiar with knives. So she took the dagger and tested it. “It’s not sharp,” she said. He told her, “It needs to be blunt.” Then, he put it to her neck.
Domina admitted to freaking out, saying, “I have this thing I need to go to. Thank you for your time.” She sat in her car and thought, what the fuck just happened?
As she mulled it over, she thought, “hmm, that was fun.” But her religious past reminded her that kink is shameful. While she felt a mixture of guilt and curiosity, she ultimately decided that life is short. Plus, she didn’t get many opportunities because of her disability. So she said, “fuck this.”
They dated for four and a half years, and he was her master. He’s the one who took her to her first dungeon, but he didn’t prepare
her, aside from: Don’t interrupt a scene or approach people in scenes. She asked, “What the fuck is a scene?” He said, “People play.” She asked, “With what?” He said, “You’ll see.”
Domina said she would never do that to someone. At the time, though, it was new and exciting, and she was happy to be included.
At the dungeon, he made her sit and watch while he played with a female sub. He started with rough body play where he was beating and biting her. He dug his fingers on pressure points and stuck his fingers in her mouth.
Ballerina Goddess was scared. She didn’t want to look weird, but she needed to advocate for herself. She tried to fit in, but she walked out while they were in the middle of the scene, petrified.
She sat by herself, shaking, realizing she couldn’t call a taxi because she didn’t know the address, and she needed video for an interpreter. Even though she was upset, she wanted more information. She also realized that maybe there weren’t deaf people in the dungeon because it’s not accessible. She lamented that deaf people are expected to make hearing people comfortable when it should be the other way around.
After an hour, she went back in. He approached her with, “Where the hell have you been?” They went home and had a deep conversation. She didn’t like him beating up the sub. He explained, “That’s what she likes!” Puzzled, she just went along with it, and was with him for four years, learning about kink in the process.
While Ballerina Goddess stated that was a shitty way to learn about kink, she also learned what not to do as a ProDomme.
That master introduced her to rope and tying. Domina felt loved and comfortable when she was tied. During rope play, partners are connected with a nonverbal, shared energy.
Then jealousy hit because he was poly. She sacrificed herself, her education, and the things that were most important in order to make him happy. When she realized that she had lost control, she sought to regain it… but he didn’t approve.
Their breakup caused her to spiral, stirring up memories of a childhood trauma that had left her distrusting men. Ballerina Goddess was in such a dark place that she attempted suicide. Luckily, she was unsuccessful.
Two months later, she found a spiritual retreat in Costa Rica. It would completely drain her savings, but she was drawn to it. While there, she experienced an emotional release, and learned the difference between spiritual and religious. She is connected to the universe spiritually and is a Reiki practitioner.
When she returned to the States, she worked on spirituality, she danced, and she attended rope conventions. This time, though, she was tying other people. She did it partially to counter the stigmas that short people can’t do it; women can’t do it; people who can’t hear can’t do it.
In fact, the second rope con she attended, someone told her, “You can’t do this because you can’t hear.” Domina said the Goddess inside wanted to say, “Just because you said that, watch me. Fucking watch me, motherfucker!”
Then she added, “I know the universe told that man to tell me that so I can be what I am today–a Shibari Mistress.”
From there, she performed ballet at cons for free and went to rope classes, and, unbeknownst to her, started a following. One of her followers was a blind man. He and his wife explained they adored her and asked if she would tie the husband.
At that time, Domina wasn’t the rope expert she is now. The wife said the two of them could just be; regardless of disability. So Ballerina Goddess said, “All right; let’s do this.”
Instead of doing a scene, however, they took a class. People assumed he would be tying her until they saw their interaction. She explained what the bottom was doing, and the man explained what they were saying. When it came time to practice, she suspended him in the air… and the class applauded.
Domina viewed the applause as pity, and said, “I’m just like you but my ears don’t work.” After that, “People shut the fuck up and stopped judging.”
A rope partner told her about DomCon, and she attended her first one in 2021. It inspired Ballerina Goddess to become a ProDomme. Where she expected ProDommes to be competitive, she found sisterhood, community, connection, and understanding. After having met the producer at the ProDomme social, Mistress Cyan invited her to be on the Board later that year.
During a session, she checks in with her bottoms by using her thumb to touch their chin, and a nod from them is a green light. If the person has an issue, the bottom will shake his head, and Domina will stop (or finish) what they’re doing, and go up to his face and read his lips. She is then able to determine if something is too tight, adjust and move on.
If a client is wearing a full mask, she makes sure his arms are free, so he can communicate with his fingers. Additionally, Domina keeps a phone nearby so she can use the translator as needed.
As a ProDomme, she continues to advocate, and wishes she would have advocated for herself a lot sooner. However, she 
recognizes that everything is a journey. Being a ProDomme is not easy, and she says you have to love it; it can’t just be for the money.
Ballerina Goddess said if she didn’t do the work she does, she wouldn’t have amazing people in her life. She pointed to Her submissive, who rubbed her feet during the interview.
His name being ares, he shared, “She made me a better person.” And Domina added, “That’s what ProDommes should be doing–making their clients better people.” She said ares was very introverted when she met him, and he wouldn’t go into public or social groups.
He found Ballerina Goddess on FetLife and went to her classes to learn how to tie. Then they met for coffee, and she talked loudly, not caring who heard, which made him feel comfortable and safe. Because of her, he’s more confident with people. She had tied him up in a public bar the previous night, which he said wouldn’t have happened before he met her. Rope came first, and he said, “It’s amazing and more people should try it.” But he also realized that he loves doing things for Her, and is learning how to be a better submissive.
She added that because he loves it, she gets satisfaction and makes sure that the relationship works both ways.
Ballerina Goddess is a believer in “what you put out there comes back to you.” When she was younger, she didn’t want to believe she had a disability. She had hearing aids. She could hear. She’s oral (a deaf person who speaks). She didn’t attend a deaf institute. She ignored her disability because she didn’t like having one.
Looking back, she’s proud of Her own progress, and feels content and whole now.
I cannot call her disabled because Domina Ballerina Goddess is *able* to do anything. Instead, I will say that she has a disadvantage. But with obstacles come solutions, and Domina has learned to overcome many barriers. She’s done so with grace and humor while maintaining a positive outlook. It’s difficult not to smile in her presence because her energy is contagious.
To learn more about Ballerina Goddess, check out her website or visit her FetLife page and her Instagram.
To Domina Ballerina Goddess ~ Thank you for trusting me with your story, and for sharing your energy with me. My booth boys saw me immediately after the interview, and knew that I was affected by you. Your sparkling effervescence continues to make me smile, and I look forward to getting to know you more. *hugs*
Final Thoughts
I’ve only been to a handful of DomCons, yet each time I return, it feels like home. You’ve heard me talk about community, and I’ve given you examples of people in the scene actually practicing what they preach.
I’ve noticed something about my interactions with people in general–in a work setting or a community event–versus kinksters. In daily dealings, most people try to ignore your past. Meaning, whatever your issues or demons are, people tend not to want to get into it. The focus is the task at hand; whatever that may be.
On the flipside, kinky people not only expect you to have a past, they embrace it. Because everyone has a story. Because they understand. Because… it’s a community.
If these reviews make you curious about attending a kink convention, let me know. Also, consider going to DomCon L.A., which will be June 4-8, 2025.
Tell me what you thought of this post and see your comment in the Community Kink Chat section of the next blog post. And don’t forget to check out my New Releases section!
Do you have a kinky question you’d like answered? Use the contact form to submit your question. All questions will be kept anonymous unless you’d prefer to be named.
For other kinky advice, check my blog archives.
Happy reading,
~B.J.
